Barely There

It's been 3 years and 1 month

And we're doing okay.

Sometimes, though, brother, I forget that we've lost you

We talk about you, and laugh about you, and tell stories.

But, you're barely there.

I don't want you to fade away

I want to hold onto you.

I try, but it's hard.

I forget your deep tenor voice,

your kwerky smile,

your engineer-minded projects.

Your passion for all things Subaru was contagious

And your passion for life was just as much so.

It's as if you were a brightly lit flame for only such a time

Now, all I see is what one sees when they close their eyes

after turning off bright lights.

Dots and sparkles in my vision of where you once were.

I know this is the way it will be until I see you again,

but barely there is better than not at all.